Dear Dr. R.V. Shrink:
My husband and I get along just fine while traveling, until he panics. When he becomes lost or confused as to which way we should turn, it suddenly becomes my fault. He thinks I should have read his mind, known he was going to become confused, and
be able to give him instant directional help.
One day I lost it and threw the Rand McNally at him. I know that probably wasn't a good idea, but he was impatient and rude.
When I do try to help him, he says I’m nagging, I’m wrong, I’m directionally challenged or I couldn’t find my seatbelt with both hands.
Do I need to put up with this abuse? How can we turn our directional relationship into a bit more of a civil conversation?
--You Turn in Yuma
Dear Yuma:
It takes a village to direct an RV. There is a general rule that few people seem to follow in directional relationships. I don’t think it is widely known outside of RV academia. It is called the “Nagivation Theory.”
Everyone in the vehicle has the right and duty to be involved in “Nagivation.” Holding on to the steering wheel does not give one passenger sway over all the others.
In your case, you should both be involved in deciding your route and in navigating it. The old saying, “two heads are better than one” fits perfectly here.
It should take much less "Nagivation" these days if you implement the use of all the tools available for navigation. Instead of using just a map book, familiarize your route using map apps, GPS, and even google earth.
If your husband is a nervous driver, pay close attention when you are coming to decision points and work together to alleviate his anxiety by feeding him information that is helpful before he goes ballistic.
Knowing where you are going is also a safety issue. You don’t want to be making sudden lane changes, quick turns and ducking map missiles.
When coming into a congested area it is better to pull over when convenient and do a bit of studying together so you are both on the same map page.
Doing a bit of homework will eliminate a lot of “Nagivation” and make you less of a "Nagivator"
--Keep Smilin', Dr. R.V. Shrink
Wednesday, April 6, 2016
Wednesday, March 30, 2016
RV yap flap
Dear Dr. R.V. Shrink:
We travel a good share of the year in a very small travel trailer. It forces us to spend a lot of our time outdoors. We love the lifestyle as we both spent years trapped in a cubicle working for Fortune 500 companies. It is like having a backpack with wheels.
The problem I have is keeping track of my husband. He tends to be a yapper. I think if we had a larger RV he might just go inside when he tired of outdoor activities, but instead he now goes in search of other campers to talk with and sometimes annoy.
He says I am imagining the worst and assuming these people are annoyed with his constant social butterfly patterns. Do you think a more spacious rig would anchor him a bit? I sometimes think he is angling for an invite into some of these large, plush rock star buses by pretending he is interested in buying one.
I don't mind him networking with other campers, but do you think his behavior is normal when he constantly seeks out other campers to kibitz with?
--Yap Flap in Flagstaff
Dear Yap Flap:
Unless he is constantly angling for a sleep over, I think his behavior is perfectly normal. Perhaps he was psychologically damaged more than you from being locked up for years in a cubicle. Did he have a window? Was there any contact with co-workers?
I cannot gauge as to whether he is a closet "Big Rig" yearner. I assume he did not equate your very small trailer with his cubicle or he never would have agreed to live in it for months at a time. But he could be in denial. You should discuss it with him.
I wouldn't take his wandering so personal. A wonderful part of camping is sparking spontaneous conversations with people from all walks of life, with a kaleidoscope of interests. Those conversations spawn all kinds of great ideas, answer puzzling questions, vary your travel path, and develop new friendships.
There is a fine line between sparking up a conversation and annoying people. Most of us can sense when it's time to push on with the dialog or simply push on. If you do not think your husband is picking up on the subtle body language that signals a timeout, then you may want to school him on it. You can save a lot of money by sitting down and discussing these issues. Otherwise you might be rambling around in a rock star bus all alone while your husband is out talking to strangers about tiny trailers. --Keep Smilin', Dr. R.V. Shrink
We travel a good share of the year in a very small travel trailer. It forces us to spend a lot of our time outdoors. We love the lifestyle as we both spent years trapped in a cubicle working for Fortune 500 companies. It is like having a backpack with wheels.
The problem I have is keeping track of my husband. He tends to be a yapper. I think if we had a larger RV he might just go inside when he tired of outdoor activities, but instead he now goes in search of other campers to talk with and sometimes annoy.
He says I am imagining the worst and assuming these people are annoyed with his constant social butterfly patterns. Do you think a more spacious rig would anchor him a bit? I sometimes think he is angling for an invite into some of these large, plush rock star buses by pretending he is interested in buying one.
I don't mind him networking with other campers, but do you think his behavior is normal when he constantly seeks out other campers to kibitz with?
--Yap Flap in Flagstaff
Dear Yap Flap:
Unless he is constantly angling for a sleep over, I think his behavior is perfectly normal. Perhaps he was psychologically damaged more than you from being locked up for years in a cubicle. Did he have a window? Was there any contact with co-workers?
I cannot gauge as to whether he is a closet "Big Rig" yearner. I assume he did not equate your very small trailer with his cubicle or he never would have agreed to live in it for months at a time. But he could be in denial. You should discuss it with him.
I wouldn't take his wandering so personal. A wonderful part of camping is sparking spontaneous conversations with people from all walks of life, with a kaleidoscope of interests. Those conversations spawn all kinds of great ideas, answer puzzling questions, vary your travel path, and develop new friendships.
There is a fine line between sparking up a conversation and annoying people. Most of us can sense when it's time to push on with the dialog or simply push on. If you do not think your husband is picking up on the subtle body language that signals a timeout, then you may want to school him on it. You can save a lot of money by sitting down and discussing these issues. Otherwise you might be rambling around in a rock star bus all alone while your husband is out talking to strangers about tiny trailers. --Keep Smilin', Dr. R.V. Shrink
Tuesday, March 22, 2016
Where there is (camp)fire, there may not be smoke
Dear Dr. R.V. Shrink:
We already carry everything, including the kitchen sink, but now my wife wants me to buy a portable propane fire pit. When did campfires go high tech?
At first I laughed at her, then I discovered she was serious. Whatever happened to "smoke follows beauty?" My old Scoutmaster would turn over in his grave. I have heard of gas around the campfire, but not a camp fired by gas.
How do I talk my wife out of this crazy idea? Please tell me you are not in favor of modernizing this age old camping tradition.
--Nostalgic in Needles
Dear Nostalgic:
I am sorry to say, tradition lost me when campfire wood went from free to six bucks a bundle. When I say a bundle, I mean six sticks of wood wrapped in plastic. Usually it is some fast burning variety like cedar. We call that "gopher wood." You throw some on the fire and go fer more.
I think the most lucrative work-camper job you could score would be the campfire wood concession at any Federal or State Park.
Another great place to sit around the propane campfire is the desert where wood is often scarce. They are easy to clean up after, convenient to extinguish, and you can light up at the drop of a hat.
This is not to say you still can't have a traditional campfire whenever you have access to wood, marshmallows, chocolate and Graham Crackers. There is nothing like good hot coals to cook over, but in fire danger areas a propane campfire is much safer to sit around and tell ghost stories, jokes, tall tales, and just plain lie to each other. --Keep Smilin', Dr. R.V. Shrink
We already carry everything, including the kitchen sink, but now my wife wants me to buy a portable propane fire pit. When did campfires go high tech?
At first I laughed at her, then I discovered she was serious. Whatever happened to "smoke follows beauty?" My old Scoutmaster would turn over in his grave. I have heard of gas around the campfire, but not a camp fired by gas.
How do I talk my wife out of this crazy idea? Please tell me you are not in favor of modernizing this age old camping tradition.
--Nostalgic in Needles
Dear Nostalgic:
I am sorry to say, tradition lost me when campfire wood went from free to six bucks a bundle. When I say a bundle, I mean six sticks of wood wrapped in plastic. Usually it is some fast burning variety like cedar. We call that "gopher wood." You throw some on the fire and go fer more.
I think the most lucrative work-camper job you could score would be the campfire wood concession at any Federal or State Park.
Another great place to sit around the propane campfire is the desert where wood is often scarce. They are easy to clean up after, convenient to extinguish, and you can light up at the drop of a hat.
This is not to say you still can't have a traditional campfire whenever you have access to wood, marshmallows, chocolate and Graham Crackers. There is nothing like good hot coals to cook over, but in fire danger areas a propane campfire is much safer to sit around and tell ghost stories, jokes, tall tales, and just plain lie to each other. --Keep Smilin', Dr. R.V. Shrink
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